Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Racist Gentitals

Years ago I started to suspect that my penis was a racist and after hours of research…okay. Fine. Minutes of research, I’ve realized that its true. I can not for whatever reason watch Asian men having sex. I don’t know if its because of the sounds they make or if its because they sound like characters from cartoons I like boning. But I just cant handle it. Literally. In a lot of Japanese porn the chicks sound like they’re getting murdered when they have sex and I’ve always wondered if that translates over to real life. I’ve never had sex with an Asian so I can neither confirm nor deny that this is a thing. Loud sex just makes me wait for the police to come arrest my ass. “Get off her, mandingo!”

Admittedly most of the Asian porn I have watched is from American Asians. The real stuff is good but then tends to take a turn somewhere that makes me go “Oh, hey this is…what is she…oh, come on!” The actresses I lean towards are Loni Punani and Lucy Thai. Both of them can be a bit too hardcore for me to the point if I met them in real life I’d give them a hug and tell them it’ll get better one day. I’ve never seen them sleep with Asian guys either. I wonder if there are many that do straight porn. I know from working at the porn shop that there are plenty of gay Asian porn tapes.

There are a lot of porn scenes that involve bondage and women being felt up by a bunch of dudes. I’ll never get that which is why I missed out on so much action when I was younger. Another guy enters the room and my libido leaves. This is an example of a scene taking a wrong turn somewhere.

This woman keeps me from smashing things.

I’m still not sure why I cant watch a scene with an Asian guy. I’m sitting here trying to figure it out because there is a lot of hot ass women that I’m missing out on because of some dude. I’ve watched porn with men from countries from all over the world and it didn’t have an effect on me. I wonder if anyone else has this issue. Its kinda like when you watch a porn and the guy is scary big. You just wanna release your demon seed and this guy steps into camera two minutes after his dick and you realize how unfair life is.

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