Thursday, February 28, 2013

Girls Gone Broke

Girls Gone Wild has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy with over $16 million is claims. The douche nozzle, Joe Francis, who started the series but no longer owns it, has a huge gambling problem and is being hit up for $10 million. In a statement the company said “re-structure its frivolous and burdensome legal affairs.“ Girls Gone Wild, or GGW for us cool kids, was one of the reasons I was excited to work at the porn shop. I didn’t have to order this shit like some pervert or watch the censored commercials at home at 3 in the morning. I don’t know if you’ve seen these but they are a huge let down to my penis. Its like watching what it is. Guys begging drunk girls to flash their tits for an hour. Seriously. That is all this series is.

Well, later they went a more lesbian route and had drunk girls making out and feeling each other up in the Shower of Dead Dreams. I know that lots of dudes are into chicks making out but I just cant add myself to that equation when the sexy time is happening. Yes, drunk girls are cool but that’s only like 10% of them. The other 90% are angry and sloppy and what they are doing does not look as hot as they think.

Pictured: bad life decisions being made.

I can sum these up easily.

Drunk Guys: Show us your tits!

Drunk Girls: No…

Drunk Guys: Come on!

Drunk Girls: No…

Drunk Guys: Tits!

Drunk Girls: Okay! Wooooo!!!

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