West Hollywood Walk of Shame 1

While working in the porn shop many celebrities would come in. Some F List actors and some very well known and popular ones. Some of them I would spot and ring up and go “Did that just happen?” This particular one hadn’t even crossed my mind until he made a recent comment online about someone that had recently passed away and I got upset. So for putting yourself on my radar, this is for you Roger Ebert.

Wikipedia describes swingers as “…a non-monogamous behavior, in which both partners in a committed relationship agree, as a couple, for both partners to engage in sexual activities with other couples as a recreational or social activity.” We sold plenty of swinger magazines. Newspaper printed and stapled shut, though that didn’t stop people from trying to actually read between the staples instead of spending the $2 to buy it.

One morning I was sitting at the counter reading a book (likely David Sedaris) when I hear someone slap a magazine on the counter. I look up and its fucking Roger Ebert, Yes, that Roger Ebert. This was pre-no jaw Ebert and I was kinda startled. Not because of who it was, but because of what he was buying.

A stack of swinger magazines!

My brain went through a range of emotions.

Huh?

No way.

Ew.

Figures.

All I knew about him was that he was married to a big Black woman, hated movies I liked, and was way shorter than I thought he’d be. He didn’t say hello or anything. He just looked away while I rang him up. I mentioned him being there to a co-worker and they were like “He’s been coming in here for years.”

Double ew.

Could you imagine the horror of answering a swing ad and get to the house and Roger fucking Ebert answered the door?

“I give that cock two thumbs down!”