Monday, August 22, 2011
Meet The Model
I personally did not get to name The Model. He was given this name by the time I started working at the porn shop. To me he was just this weird guy who would walk in and laugh like a gay pirate and ask for matches. "Can I have some matchessssssss..?" Seriously, he would drag his S's for that long. And I would hand him matches. That is until shit started bursting into flames. I'm getting ahead of myself. Let me back up a little and explain the origin of one of the most infamous characters fro the porn shop.
At the thrift store across the way people leave clothes in the back parking lot. Its out i the open and people can go through the donations if they are so inclined. The Model was. He would put the clothes on and sashay up and down the parking lot. I mean he would turn, spin, and stare at a crowd that was only in his mind. I want to say he was Puerto Rican. Very thin with a crazy Joker smile.
Like I mentioned with shit bursting into flames, the trash can outside started burning multiple times with no explanation. Just "Fwoosh!" I stopped giving The Model "matchessssssss..." and the fires stopped. For a while. Then there was one in the building. The Model was dating a guy that lived in the building named Axel. That was his actual name. A car part. "Hey, I want you to meet my son Hubcap and my daughter Radiator." Anyhoot, someone tried setting Axel's door on fire after a fight. Hmm. I wonder who it could be. Then one day they got into another fight and The Model ended up kicking a hole in the wall in the hallway. How I missed all this I'll never know.
Eventually The Model vanished into fabulous air. With a lot of the weirdos in the neighborhood that frequent the porn shop I tend to bump into them at some point. But not The Model. When it was time to exit stage left, he kept on walking.